What’s the Word

Location: Lakeview Nursing and Rehabilitation Center

Date: Wednesday, January 9, 2013; 6:30-8 pm

Although I had been to Lakeview Nursing for other program, I had not attended this one for almost two months.  Irina joined me on this occasion and we arrived to find that Larry and Jack were already in attendance.  Gwyn came soon after and so did several other volunteers.  This was going to be the most well attended ‘What’s The Word’ session since I started participating. 

January/February issue

Once again, I had inadvertently chosen to be at the unveiling of the bimonthly newsletter.  Gwyn handed out the January/February ‘As We See It’ issue, which was thicker than the earlier ones.  The issue started with discussion on some of the upcoming holidays and other occasions such as, 'Martin Luther King Day', 'President’s Day', and 'Valentine’s Day' etc.  Besides these well-known events, I also learned about other days such as ‘Three Kings Day’ on January 6^th, which has religious significance across many different cultures.  I discovered new fun facts about Valentine’s Day, such as 8 billion candy hearts being produced this year, and the number one recipients of Valentine’s Day cards – Teachers.  Who would have known!

In local news, 'Chicago Auto Show’ was going to be back in town, something that I would definitely go and visit.  I learned that this started back in 1901, when visitors were allowed to test drive the vehicles on an indoor track, unlike the more formal occasion that we have today.  Also discussed was the 'Chinese New Year and Parade' on February 17^th.  I made a note to try and go see it as well.

Next up was the book review, and another thriller.  There’s one thing to be said about the residents of Lakeview Nursing - they like their edge-of-the-seat excitement.  I am wondering if we should have a separate book club meeting every month, since it would be fantastic to discuss with Larry and the others.  Speaking of Larry, I had seen how passionate he is about sports, particularly his Chicago Bears.  Gwyn discussed the sports section, including a wrap-up on the Bears season, and some other fun facts about the superbowl.  I asked Larry whom he thought would be playing in the big game and he said Atlanta and Denver were looking good.  “Don’t say that”, I replied and made a case for my New England Patriots.  This led to a passionate discussion between me, Larry and another volunteer regarding the remaining teams in the playoffs.  Larry can go at it for a long time, and I could see out of the corner of my eye that Gwyn wanted to keep moving.  So I tried to conclude this debate, but that’s easier said than done with Larry.  Finally, we managed to end the topic and moved on.

Next was a restaurant review, where this time IHOP was featured.  Once again, I learned a new piece of trivia that February 18^th to 24^th is 'National Pancake Week'!  In every issue, there is an interview with one of the staff members.  This time it was Monica Jones from Medical Records and it was great to learn some fun things about her.  After this was my favorite section ‘Did You Know’, which is full of trivia.  For example, I learned that January 2^nd is 'New Year’s Day for Cats' and January 20^th is ‘Penguin’s Awareness Day’.  Some of the other fun days are February 17^th which is ‘My Way Day’ or its counterpart, February 28^th which is ‘Inconvenience Yourself Day’.  Finally, January 21^st is ‘National Hugging Day’ and February 16^th is ‘Do a Grouch a favor day’.  We had a great time with this section, particularly since almost everyone had not heard about any of these days and were probably looking forward to participating in some.

The puzzle

The final activity was solving the word puzzle and as usual, it got quite competitive, with people trying to find the words first and yelling out once they did.  Everyone got a chance to spot at least one, and we finished the evening after solving the puzzle.  As usual, Gwyn had baked cookies for one of the resident’s birthdays and she gave them to Larry for delivery.  It is truly remarkable how much I enjoy this simple activity of reading through a newsletter together.  One of the quotes from Monica Jones’ interview struck a chord with me.  She was asked what was it that she liked best about working at Lakeview. 

“The residents and the staff are like family.  We may not always see eye to eye but in the end we are all working for the benefit of each other”. 

It is the last part that rings true with me “We are all working for the benefit of each other”.  I do not see these evenings that I spend doing Chicago Cares projects as simply a service that I provide, but rather something that benefits me as well.  I have learned so much about the people of this world... and myself.  Also, how would I have known otherwise that  February 8-14^th is ‘Love may make the world go around but laughter keeps us from getting dizzy week’?


*All the client's names have been changed in order to respect their privacy

Read-With-Me At AIC

Location: American Indian Center

Date: Tuesday, January 8, 2013; 6:00-7:00 pm

AIC Murals

One of my earliest memories is my Dad reading a Walt Disney’s Mickey and Donald comic book to me.  It was not so much about him reading the text, but actually explaining the plot to me animatedly.  Perhaps it was that, or being around my mom’s family who were in the film industry, but story-telling has been a passion since my childhood.  I remember spending free class periods in school making up stories and telling them to my class-mates.  Even now if I had the means to be independently wealthy, I would be a story-teller.  Thus, when an opportunity states “Join students for stories and activities…You’ll read stories with the students one-on-one”, wild horses could not have kept me away.

Navajo Moon

This was another new location and I had to take the brown line CTA followed by a short walk to find the place.  The American Indian Center (AIC) is the country’s oldest cultural center for Native American Indians outside of reservation land.  As soon as one enters the building, you are exposed to the rich heritage ofthe  Native American’s, including the artifacts being displayed, as well as the painted murals on the walls.  I was directed to the first floor library where I met Wilson, our Volunteer leader for this project.  I had seen Wilson at the Bingo event at Imperial the previous week and had found him to be extremely enthusiastic.  He mentioned that the evening would comprise of us spending one-on-one time with the children; reading with them, followed by an arts and crafts exercise.  While most of the children were expected to be American Indians, AIC also provides social and educational services to other residents in the neighborhood. 

Doctor Coyote

This evening we only had three kids who were going to participate.  Before anyone joined us, Wilson told me that the teacher for their class was currently in South Africa and had sent several pictures of her over there, including some with animals.  Hence he thought that it would be a great idea to do a crafts exercise where we made African animals using paper cutouts.  He asked me to take a pick and I selected an elephant because it looked like the simplest - nay less hardest - of them all.  As I sat there cutting the pieces, a little girl came and asked my name.  I introduced myself and then she asked me to spell it out.  Once I did that, I asked her name and age.  She was Anesha, and that she was six years old.  She shook my hand and then floated away to play some games.  Next up was another girl called Pia.  She too asked my name and left.  The third kid for the evening was Wilmer, and he was older than the girls, being nine years old. 

Two other volunteers, both women, were in attendance and the two girls promptly choose them as partners.  That left Wilmer with me and I asked him to select a book.  He started with a book called ‘Mystery Of Navajo Moon’ by Timothy Green.  As Wilmer read the story of a young Navajo girl who is given a ‘diamond star’ under a ‘Navajo Moon’, I found myself being drawn into this magical tale.  Wilmer however wanted to be done with the reading and move on to the crafts section, and thus blitzed through the book.  When we finished before everyone else, Wilson insisted that we take another book and start with that.  Wilmer reluctantly choose ‘Doctor Coyote: A Native American Aesop’s Fables’ by John Bierhorst.  This was a collection of short stories with a moral at the end of each.  We were half way through this one when Wilson said that we should move on to the crafts section of the evening, something Wilmer readily accepted. 

The African Savanna

I asked Wilmer which animal he wanted to start with, and he choose a Lion.  The Lion was one of the more complex creatures in the collection, and so we both started working on this project.  At the end of the evening, we had hardly made a dent and Wilmer promised to take the rest home and work on it.  In the meanwhile Pia and Dana, her volunteer companion, had made tremendous progress on their crafts project and had built a savanna with wild bushes and giraffes.  Wilmer and the two girls left, and as we packed for the evening, Wilson told us about the other activities that are usually held in the AIC, including Native American storytelling, archery and music lessons, as well as a trek around the neighborhood looking at the native plants and herbs for medicinal purposes.  I thanked Wilson and made my way to the train station.  As usual, I had enjoyed my evening. While I may not have been as animated as my dad, I had done my part in reading with a child.  Hopefully in doing so, I had instigated the same passion for books that resides within me after all these years.  


*All the client's names have been changed in order to respect their privacy

Job Coaching

Location: Open Door Shelter

Date: Monday, January 7, 2013; 6:45-8:30 pm

When I first started volunteering with Chicago Cares back in September, I was looking to stick to neighborhoods that were somewhat familiar, easily accessible by train, or at least destinations that I could locate easily.  Even then, I have had lot of moments of hesitation at crossroads while I consulted the map on my phone, or general touristy behavior where one is lost and all others on the street can spot it easily.  I was amazed what a few months of public transportation travel to far corners of the city can do.  Now, not only was I arriving at my target with confidence, I walked around the neighborhood as if I knew it intimately.  The previous time I had visited ODS, I had walked all over trying to find a Starbucks, and even after finding one, I wasn’t sure when I should leave to make it to ODS on time.  On this occasion, I got out of the train station, went to Starbucks, worked on my computer till it was time and then arrived at ODS with minutes to spare.  I was now a certified Chicagoan.

Outside ODS

Before walking into the building, I spent a moment admiring the exterior of the facility.  The architecture is amazing, as is the lighting, which gives it a very serene quality.  Inside, I chatted with Claire, our volunteer leader and she was happy to hear that I had previous experience with this program.  As stated earlier, this is a tricky one where the kids are teenagers, and are only doing this because of a pre-requisite.  While we waited for everyone, I looked at some of the sayings that were hanging on the wall in the reception area, messages that the residents would do well to memorize.  Once the other volunteers had arrived, we went upstairs.  As before, we sat in a group -some of the kids reluctantly - and introduced ourselves.  Dion, from my previous visit was there and I was pleased to hear that he still wanted to pursue his writing ambition, as did Shawn, who wanted to learn how to fix things.  Claire split us into groups and I was to work with 3 teenagers – 2 boys and one girl.  Right of the bat I could tell from the body language that I was dealing with three distinct levels of enthusiasm.  While the girl looked like she was keen to learn, one of the boys was looking unsure while the other was visibly disinterested.  Oh man, this was going to be a challenge!

On the walls of the reception area

I started by asking them their names because the name tags were not really communicating much.  The girl was Lakeisha and the unsure boy was Devin.  Despite me asking twice, I never got a good answer from the other boy, who looked like he was falling asleep and neither did I get a good look at his tag.  To be fair to others, especially Lakeisha, I proceeded to the coaching session.  I asked them what they wanted to do with their lives and their career.  Lakeisha said that she wanted to become an Investigative Journalist.  What a fantastic choice; for I had not expected that answer from someone in her situation.  I asked Devin about what he wanted to do and his response is not something I wish to repeat in this blog.  I knew why he was doing it, but I said such an answer does not excuse him from not listening to me for the next hour and I promised him that I will interview him for the exact role that he had described for himself.  When he realized that he was not going to get out of this easily, he started paying attention.  Unfortunately, this was not the case for our other friend who started by saying he wanted to become an Astronaut, but when I said I will interview him for that, drifted off again.

I started with Lakeisha and probed her with questions that would possibly prepare her for a life of a reporter, sorry investigative journalist, as she corrected me.  She was on the editorial committee for her school newsletter and that was a solid background for what she wanted to accomplish.  She also alluded to a role model that she had - a professional journalist who was a young independent woman - and whom Lakeisha wanted to emulate.  I was thrilled that she had actually thought about her career and what it was going to take to get there. 

Devin was observing me with Lakeisha and seeing our interaction, was getting more encouraged to participate.  I asked him again what he would like to do, and his response was extraordinarily unique.  It was perhaps because we were looking at a young baby who was sitting at the table with his teenage mom, but Devin said he wanted to take care of babies.  I asked if he meant working in day care and he said yes;either that or a private nanny.  I told him that was noble idea, but he needed to build himself as a person who could be relied upon, someone whom people were going to trust with their most precious possession.  He understood what I was trying to say and was nodding during our discussions.  I gave him pointers on how he could answer interview questions to demonstrate some of the qualities expected of such a person.  I suspect that he referred to that job only because he likes babies; since there was another job he said he would like to do, and that was driving a CTA bus. I asked if it was because he did not want to be stuck indoors behind a desk and wanted to be outside.  He said yes, and he also liked following a set course - like a bus.  Considering where we had started, getting Devin to open up with such thoughtful insights was a coup for me.  We discussed some of the potential interview questions that one may encounter in such a role and once again, he was an attentive listener.

Claire had given us a list of questions that I was discussing with them and some of them were behavioral, such as conflict resolution etc.  Both of them were contributing actively at this stage and then we reached a question which convinced me that this evening had been a success.  I asked them how would they answer a question which every interviewee faces, “Where do you see yourself in five years”.  I coached them on how they should show interest in the job they were applying for and tailor their response around that.  Lakeisha asked me how they could respond to this if they were applying for a job flipping burgers at a fast food joint.  How were they to show excitement for something which was not their ultimate goal, but a way to pay the bills?  This made me realize that I was dealing with two young people who really wanted to do something with their lives and not just make money.  I said they should look at the person and say “I still want to be in this company, but in a corporate role”.  This would show the manager their willingness to do the job, their ambition for growth, as well as their loyalty to the Company.  Both Lakeisha and Devin liked this response, and I have a feeling that they would use something like this if the occasion demands it.

While I could have discussed more with them, unfortunately Claire announced that our time was up.  I wished them both success and left.  I walked out with another volunteer who said that he worked with Dion and they had exchanged contact information so as to continue the dialogue.  It was fantastic to see everyone’s commitment and if we as volunteers can communicate that, then the kids will follow and pay attention.  While I have been proud of all of my work with Chicago Cares, today I really felt as if I had made a difference.  I hope Lakeisha and Devin feel that way too. 


*All the client's names have been changed in order to respect their privacy

Senior Breakfast Club

Location: Mary Hartwell Catherwood Apartments

Date: Saturday, January 5, 2013; 9:00 am-12:00 pm

I have not cooked at my apartment for a long time…a very long time.  So signing up for a Breakfast Club, where cooking would probably be a part of the job description, was an interesting choice.  But I had heard that the cooking programs are the most fun and so I was excited to attend.  So far I had never been late for any of my volunteering activities.  However, today was one time when I was pushing it.  Plus something happened for the first time since I moved to Chicago – I missed getting off at my train stop.  Thus, at the next stop I got out and ran down the stairs to get a cab.  I got there just 10 minutes late, but the cooking had already begun.  I apologized to Sandy, our Volunteer Leader, but she said that they had just started and I could find an activity which required help.

There was already a person making scrambled eggs whereas someone else was cooking sausages, and a third was baking biscuits.  I was assigned the task of chopping fruits for a salad.  The fruits were from a bag, but we wanted them in bite sized pieces.  After 15 minutes and one bag, my hands were dripping with syrup and I had also managed to create a mess.  But Sandy seemed satisfied with my work and I looked for my next task.  The residents had started arriving and they needed help in serving them orange juice and coffee.  One volunteer had already started on this activity, but I made the rounds asking if they wanted refills.  

Barry's piano

My attention was directed to the back of the room where a gentleman was opening a piano.  I walked up to him and asked if he played.  He said yes, though not as much as he would like owing to arthritis.  He introduced himself as Barry and said he had always been musically oriented and had started playing guitar at the age of fifteen.  When I told him my name, he asked if it was Irish!  I have been called many things, but never Irish.  I laughed out loud and asked if my green eyes gave me away.  He enjoyed that one and then started playing.  I stood there listening for some time, but there was work to be done.  Plus Barry’s music was there in the background.

By now all the residents had arrived and breakfast was ready to be served.  There was an assembly line for plating eggs, sausages, biscuits, potatoes and the fruit cup.  I would pick up the filled plates and serve them at various tables.  Some would request a refill on their coffee or orange juice or seconds.  Our job was to ensure that they got whatever they wanted promptly.  Barry had stopped playing and was having his breakfast as well.  In the meanwhile, another resident had arrived and she owned the room.  She hugged everyone, apparently familiar with them and then when I introduced myself, she said she was Georgia, and gave me a hug as well.  Now that everyone was busy eating I drifted over towards Sandy to chat with her.

Sandy is one of the most enthusiastic people that I have come across.  She has been doing this program for the past seven years and most of her crew (for that's what we were) have known her for a long time.  There was a definite comfort level with which people were operating together as a team, something that only develops over time.  Sandy had baked brownies for the residents and was serving them.  She had also woven some mittens which she was giving out to the volunteers.  What a lady!

After breakfast we were going to be playing Bingo, and Sandy was busy sorting out the gifts that were going to be handed to the winners.  I asked her how much the budget was and she said her total budget for the month was $140, and this hardly covered all the food, utensils and the bingo prizes.  She said that almost every time she puts in lot of her own money into buying the supplies.  Having seen her interact with everyone, I was not surprised she would do that.  As we were chatting, Sandy pointed towards a table and said that all the ‘popular’ folks sat over there and one had to be in the ‘inner circle’ to be invited.  After all these years, it was high school all over again.

Once the breakfast was done, people started clearing the tables, preparing for Bingo.  However, dishes needed to be done and I volunteered to scrub.  Now this was not going to be an easy task, especially with grease in the big serving vessels.  Plus, being on a budget we did not exactly have lot of scrubbers.  I rolled-up my sleeves and got down to it.  It took a lot of time, over half an hour.  The toughest were the sausages and potatoes trays, but by far the worst was the eggs.  Because after I was done scrubbing, I had to clean the sink which was clogged with the leftovers.  I did have help in rinsing, and between the two of us we got it done.

BINGO time

Bingo was in full swing by the time I got back in the main cafeteria.  One thing I have realized is people take their Bingo very seriously.  I started walking around and stopped by to chat with Barry, but even then his one eye was always on the board.  Unlike the boards that we used in Imperial Nursing Home, these had red translucent windows which you could pull out to cover the number being called.  So if you had the number on your board, you would pull out the window.  I saw one lady who had not done it for several windows and I helped her correct that.  In a later game after she won, I realized that she was following the opposite system i.e. initially closing all windows and then opening them if her number was called.  I had inadvertently spoiled her earlier game!  After this I avoided going over to her side of the room. 

Once the prizes were all handed out, the game was over and we started packing up.  I helped stash Bingo supplies in the closet and said goodbye to Barry.  He said it had been nice meeting me and it was a mutual feeling to have met a gentleman such as himself.  One of the elderly ladies was flirting with a young volunteer by asking if he wanted to be her date for a night out on the town that evening.  We all laughed and soon the residents left, not before Georgia had given all of us another hug.  I am constantly amazed by the warmth with which all the people have accepted us in their lives.  Contrast this with some of the other social occasions that I have been to with people near my age, who hardly introduce themselves and even then there is a very guarded approach.  Some evenings after work, my colleagues go for drinks at the local watering hole.  People ask me why I prefer to go volunteering when I could be doing that instead.  Do I really need to answer? 


*All the client's names have been changed in order to respect their privacy

Just for Starters Imperial Bingo

Location: The Imperial Nursing Home

Date: Thursday, January 3, 2013; 6:30-7:45 pm

In all of my thirty…well let’s just say I have been on this planet for many years.  In all this time, I had never played Bingo.  There, I said it.  This meant that I had to take last minute Bingo lessons before the event.  My friends at work were amused when I asked questions.  Jen in Pittsburgh even sent me several links on Bingo, and armed with this knowledge, I arrived at The Imperial Nursing Home. 

The first thing I noticed about Imperial Nursing Home was its décor.  The lobby waiting area looked sophisticated and even the corridors were different.  They had a unique Parisian setting and it was confirmed that Paris was indeed the theme that they were going for.  This was quite unlike the Lakeview Nursing facility, which had a more traditional setting. 

I met with Sarah, our Volunteer Leader and mentioned that I had never played Bingo before.  She said it is the easiest thing in the world and then asked if I wanted to call out the numbers.  I said that due to my lack of experience, I should probably decline that, and which meant that I would be playing alongside the residents. The idea was to let them play and ensure that they do not miss a number, help them call out Bingo when they achieved it, and under no circumstances were we - the volunteers - to ever ‘win’.  At this stage I was also introduced to another enthusiastic volunteer, Wilson Chow.  Remember that name, Wilson; it is going to show up a lot in this blog.

The Parisian Setting

Sarah seemed to be an extremely friendly person.  This was emphasized by the banter she had with one of the residents, Gavin.  They were going at it non-stop, and it was evident that Sarah was much beloved at the Imperial Nursing Home.  We went inside to the community room where all the residents were ready to play.  Sarah assigned me a table with 2 women, Penny and Cathy.  I introduced myself to them and even complimented Cathy on her jewelry, particularly her rings.  We started playing and my job was to look at Penny and Cathy’s boards and see that they were paying attention and not missing out on any of the numbers.  I was also paying attention to my own board, though I might as well have given up since my luck was lousy that evening.  After a couple of games, we were joined by another resident.  I asked her name and she said it was Jackie. As we continued playing, nobody on our table was winning and Sarah was handing out all of the good prizes. Finally Penny won, not just once, but back-to-back.  Sarah came to offer her prizes and Penny selected a Body Lotion and Sugar-free candy.  The reason she did it was because Jackie asked her to and to my immense surprise and pleasure, Penny handed her candy to Jackie.  Soon Sarah was out of gifts and the game was over.

All the volunteers said goodbye and left, but I saw Wilson helping some residents in wheelchairs up to the elevators and to their floors.  I joined him and it was a challenge getting people inside and making sure the people on a certain floor are in the right spot on the elevator. With some adjustments we managed that, and once everyone was taken care of, I left.  I contemplated how the day had started with me having no idea was Bingo was, to this evening where I had a great time and was now a big fan.  This is what volunteering with Chicago Cares has been about for me.  People think that by helping people I am doing a great service for those in need.  What they do not realize is that Chicago Cares helps me a lot as well.  It makes me a better man.  Yes, I have said that before, but I am proud to repeat it again. 

There is a small story which I want to add here.  It is silly, but somehow it seems appropriate.  Prior to this, I had never considered myself a very helpful person in social situations.  As I was walking back that evening, I passed by the AMC cinema’s near my apartment.  I saw a young woman trying to open the door, but for whatever reason, she was unable to do so.  At that precise moment, our eyes met, I saw the helplessness and in a grand manner, I opened the door for her.  We both smiled and I waved her to her cab.  It was a small gesture, but the moment felt right and I am not sure I would have done it with so much enthusiasm 4 months ago.  Right then I knew it was going to be a great new year. 


*All the client's names have been changed in order to respect their privacy

Macy’s ‘Believe’ Campaign for Make-A-Wish® - Part 4

Location: Macy’s in Water Tower Place

Date: November & December 2012

As we got closer to Christmas, I started checking Macy’s website to see how many letters had been received.  By December 7^th, the count was a little over 542,000, which meant that there still was long ways to go to make it to the $1 Million target, and not too many days left.  I sent a company wide email to my colleagues at work, asking them to participate and irrespective of their age, write a letter to Santa.  I also sent a similar message to my old colleagues in Pittsburgh, as well as some of the other people I knew.  Every wish would help, including my own.

Christmas Morning: When all wishes come true

Macy’s had designated December 14^th as ‘Believe Day’.  All the letters received that day would be worth double.  Thus I had chosen that day to write my letter.  Since I was collecting the letters at the Water Tower Place, I thought about submitting my letter at a different location, the Macy’s on State Street.  I was supposed to go see ‘A Christmas Carol’ that evening and arrived in Macy’s with 40 minutes to spare.  It took me some time to locate the mail box and when I found it, I saw several kids and their parents sitting by the mailbox writing letters with colorful crayons.  I took a postcard, borrowed a pen and sat at a table.  It had taken me some time to frame it, but I had come prepared with the exact wish that I wanted to make.  However as I started writing it down, I felt that is was not what I truly wanted to wish for and at the last moment I changed my wish.  I thought about that as I put the letter in the mailbox.  Sometimes true wishes are made on the spur of the moment and all that you planned for means nothing.  Later as I saw ‘A Christmas Carol’, I realized how that story is about someone who spends his whole life not believing in miracles or the nobility of people and at the end is convinced otherwise.  While I was by no means like Ebenezer Scrooge, I too had been converted from a skeptic to a believer.

I went to visit my friends in Connecticut for Christmas.  They have a three and a half year old boy, and one of the highlights of my trip was to see his anticipation build up days before Christmas. Leading up to it, he had done everything what his parents had said.  He had been nice and had even left milk and cookies for Santa next to the tree the night before. On Christmas morning it was wonderful to see him run down the stairs, pick up the presents by the tree and rip them open to see if Santa had gotten him what he had wished for.  While I had seen the letters, nothing drove home the point more than seeing the sincerity of a child’s belief, and the pure joy when all of their wishes come true.

My final batch

I returned back and made one last journey to Macy’s.  For my final collection I had over 800 letters.  As I laid them out on my apartment floor and counted them, I realized this would be the last  time that I would be doing it.  For the past two months, I had a fixed schedule each week – one which I followed for most parts.  This included picking up the letters from Macy’s at noon on Friday, sorting and counting on Sunday - after which I would send Jeanne an email - and then carrying them with me to office on Monday.  During lunch break on Monday I would walk up to Make-A-Wish offices and drop off the letters.  I had gotten used to this so much, that not doing this moving forward was going to be a strange feeling.  I carried them to Make-A-Wish office and handed them to Jeanne.  I thanked her for the opportunity and said that it had been the single greatest privilege of my life to have carried each of the 3,535 letters that Macy’s at Water Tower Place has received.  She said that she was grateful to have me on their team and would look forward to my participation again, something that I really hope will happen.

One Friday evening I was sitting in a mall coffee shop counting the letters, and one woman looking at what I was doing, asked if I was Santa.  “I’m just an elf”, I had replied.  She said it was great what we were doing and I thanked her.  Overall we had reached our goal and crossed a million letters (1,000,104 to be precise). I was proud to have helped in a small way, though the real heroes were the people – young and old - who had truly believed.  

After my friend’s son had finished playing with his toys that Christmas morning, my friend asked when was it that I stopped believing in Santa. At what age had I realized all of this was made up. I just looked at him and replied, “What do you mean stopped”.

Arts and Eats

Location: Flannery Apartments

Date: Wednesday, December 19, 2012; 6:15-7:30 pm

The day before, I had received an email from Chicago Cares saying that our usual leader Alice was under the weather, and asking if I could lead instead. Since I had a commitment till right before the event, I said that I may be unable to purchase the various supplies that were needed for the evening, though I was more than happy to lead once at the facility.  Fortunately, another volunteer offered to take over the responsibility and all I had to do was show up.

The City from Flannery Apartments

I arrived there and found that our usual meeting room was locked.  I was directed towards the 16^th floor and the community room over there.  Two of the ladies whom I had met during my first visit, Anna and Sandra, were already waiting for us.  Ian, who had taken over the leadership duties for the evening was running late.  I chatted with the ladies and learned that Sandra had two doctor’s appointments the next day and was hoping that her husband would be able to drive her there, especially since he was prone to frustrations while driving, bordering on road rage.  We were laughing about it and I noticed that the room that we were in had giant windows overlooking the city.  In fact, there was a terrace and I went outside to see the city like never before.  I told the ladies that if I lived there, I would spend all my time in that room or outside looking at the city. 

This is what I started with

Ian arrived and apologized for his tardiness.  He worked in the suburbs and had to stop to buy supplies.  I suddenly felt slightly ashamed at having declined to lead because of my work, whereas here was someone who had probably struggled through traffic to get here on time and stop for buying the materials we would be using.  That evening we would be decorating jewelry boxes, something that the ladies had done recently, but enjoyed a lot.  Ian had purchased wooden boxes, plenty of colors, glue and some buttons and sparkles.  Sandra went back to her apartment and bought some of her own private stock.  One of the other residents Sally, arrived and started on her box.  Then something possessed me like never before and I attacked my box with a maniacal zeal. 

And this is what I made

I started with a blue wash on the top and drew brown stripes on the front and sides.  This was followed by green edges and another coat of blue for insides of the drawer.  I used brushes of different thickness and whatever container I could find to hold the colors.  I had hoped to do two boxes and give one each to two of my friends, but could only finish one in allocated time.  So I choose one and wrote their initials inside the drawer.  Then I stuck some stickers on the top and wrapped the box in some paper since the paint was not fully dry yet.  Others had done a fantastic job with their boxes and I especially liked Sandra's who had just used a clear coat to give her box a very polished look.  During our paint session we had also learned a something about our companions.  Ian had innocently asked the ladies if they had any kids and both, Anna and Sandra, had lost their babies long time ago.  While it was extremely sad, what amazed me was the matter-of-fact way in which they said it, as if they were immune to it.  I wondered if that was what had led them to this place.  Sandra said that doing Arts and Crafts activities such as these was a therapy session.  No matter how they said it, the pain was still there.

Just before leaving the ladies joked that there was no ‘Eats’ component to our gathering that night.  Ian apologized sheepishly, but they had enjoyed our session nevertheless.  I helped Ian clean-up and then left for home.  The next day I gave the box to my friend, who greatly appreciated it.  I was surprised at the transformation that I had undergone.  From my first session where I did not want to participate, to last night where I couldn't get enough of painting jewelry boxes, it has been a remarkable journey.  I doubt if any of my colleagues had spent the previous evening with such interesting women and doing such an activity.  They have no idea what they are missing.


*All the client's names have been changed in order to respect their privacy

Lakeview Seniors Pet Therapy

Location: Lakeview Nursing and Rehabilitation Center

Date: Monday, December 17, 2012; 6:30-8:00 pm

Daisy

The program description for this one intrigued me a lot.  “Pairs of volunteers make the rounds with a friendly pet to socialize with residents in individual rooms. Volunteers without pets will pair up with pet owners.”  I have always been very fond of dogs, without making any commitment to having one as a pet.  This seemed like a great way to spend an evening with pets, while serving the seniors at Lakeview Nursing.

A day before, I learned that my friend Irina had also signed up for this project and  I met up with her next evening in the lobby.  Every Monday evening Chicago Cares also hosts Bingo and so the place was full of volunteers.  Soon the pet owners started arriving.  First up was a woman win a cat called Soldier.  He was a cat who seemed to be at ease and proceeded to stretch out and relax.  Next to arrive was a woman with a dog called Daisy.  She was one of the friendliest dogs that I have seen.  Not only did Daisy get along well with us and other volunteers, she and Soldier bonded and played with each other while we waited to begin. Besides Daisy there were several other dogs, including a pair, Bruce and June and someone called Rex.

Daisy bonds with Soldier

Our volunteer leader Fran gathered us and when she realized Irina and I were together, assigned us to walk with Sarah, Daisy’s owner. Fran told us that we were to enter rooms and ask if the residents wanted to pet the dog.  If they said yes, we would go in and let the dog play with them for a bit, without letting them get on the bed.  This was because one of the residents was scratched by a dog during one such event and while she did not mind, the nurses were worried that this would lead to infection, especially due to their reduced immunity. 

Having done this many times, Sarah knew where to go and what to do.  We started on the third floor and went around the rooms where Sarah would peek in and ask the residents if they wanted to pet a dog.  Many said yes and so we would go inside and let Daisy play with the resident while we chatted with them.  Many talked about pets they used to have and one lady even made me look inside her desk drawer to find pictures of her cat.  After a while I got the hang of the process and started going inside the rooms to check if the residents wanted us to visit.  At some places we found Bruce and June were already in there and the rule was only one pet owner at a time. We met a lot of remarkable people that day, including a lady with doggie treats and a gentleman whose room had the most spectacular holiday decorations.  He knew Sarah and Daisy (as did most others) and thus it was more about them catching-up on what had happened since their last visit.  

Bruce and June

Daisy was brilliant.  She was well-behaved and let people play with her without complaints.  However the temperature inside the Nursing Home was set very high and Daisy was starting to get tired.  Sarah decided to call it a night soon and we walked down with them.  We left the nursing home thinking about the concluding lines of the program description on Chicago Cares website: “Come be surprised by how much joy an animal can bring into someone else's day.”  I think that is very accurate… and not just for the residents.

Uptown Students On Stage

Location: Brennemann (Joseph) Elementary School

Date: Saturday, December 15, 2012; 10:00 am-12:00 pm

December 14^th 2012 was one of the darkest days, not just in my lifetime, but for many others as well.  As the world woke up trying to comprehend what had happened in Newtown, Connecticut; I was headed to Brennemann Elementary School to participate in 'Uptown Students On Stage' program.  We were going to be working with children, participating in acting and improv games.  Initially apprehensive since I have no experience with acting, I found that this was just the therapy that was needed.

Cafeteria wall

Upon arriving at the school, I was directed towards the cafeteria where there was a big crowd of children and adults.  This would have made this program one of the most popular that I had attended, but I realized that there were multiple projects going on that morning, including ‘Read With Me’ and ‘Tech Club’.  I found Tara, the volunteer leader for my program and she said that soon the rest of the group would leave and we would have the cafeteria to ourselves.  After that happened, we were left with 3 children and 6 volunteers, including Tara and myself.

The first game we played was ‘Holiday Party Name Game’.  We all stood in a circle and introduced ourselves as if attending a holiday party and were bringing one item that started with the first letter of our name.  Furthermore, we were supposed to mime that object and the next person in the circle - besides their own name and thing - repeated all other names and the things they were getting.  This was a brilliant way for the children to remember everyone’s name.  When my turn came, I said that the thing I was getting to the party was a rose and then took a deep breath, smelling an imaginary rose.  Through this I game I found out that the 3 children were Adam, Yasmin and Serena and the volunteers were Sydney, Rebecca, Sara and Katherine.  Adam is a very shy boy who participates readily, but needs to be coaxed to speak up.  Yasmin is a sweet girl who was enjoying this whereas Serena was very active and seemed in her element.

Sydney led the next game and was brilliant at it.  She seemed like a natural and I later learned that not only did she have some theater training, but she was also a teacher at a school and thus very comfortable with kids.  The game was ‘Greetings’ and we were to walk around the room and when we encountered someone else, were to introduce ourselves as different characters, ranging from Santa Claus, to an Elf, to a Video game character.  We also were to show different emotions such as happy or angry to see them, and also meet them as long lost friends or as if we were walking in heavy snow.  Sydney really did a very good job keeping us motivated and herself was quite exuberant in her role-play. 

Next we played ‘Mime Telephone’, where we stood in a line and the person at the head of the line mimed something.  Without saying a word, the next person mimed what they interpreted and we continued all the way till the last person guessed what the thing was.  Sticking with the holiday theme, the mimes were for Christmas tree decoration and Santa Claus and for most parts, everyone got it.

Following this game was ‘The Scream’.  For this we stood around in a circle, looking at the ground.  Then we would all lift our heads up at the same time and then look either straight or sideways.  If two people’s eyes met, both are supposed to scream loudly and ‘drop dead’.  This is supposed to continue till only one or two are left.  I was not looking forward to this one, especially with the screaming.  Whether by design or luck, I never had to scream and was the last person standing…twice.

Next up was ‘Fortunately, Unfortunately’ where we once again stood in a circle.  One person starts a story and the next one continues it by saying ‘Fortunately’.  The next one then proceeds with an unfortunate occurrence and so and so forth.  Since there were nine of us, we each alternated between something fortunate and unfortunate as we went around the circle.  This was one of my favorites since we were doing something creative and was a great way for the kids to come up with innovative ideas.

Then was game which was popular with the kids, ‘Emotion Party’.  In this, the three children went out of the room with a volunteer and made up some emotion or a character that they wanted to play.  Then they would come in the room and act that out while the rest of the volunteers guessed who they were.  I was amazed at how much the kids liked performing and in fact, they tried to do as many characters and emotions as they could. 

Finally, we sat down to play the lengthiest game of the day, ‘Skit Creation’.  This was something the kids enjoyed doing as well.  The idea was to write a short story, including characters and dialogues; assign roles and then perform.  This was going to be one of those 24-hour workshops where people try to make a film from scratch in a day.  In our case we had 20 minutes.

The story we came up with was a Christmas party where two children break a vase while playing.  This happens because the Christmas tree topples over onto the vase.  Fearing their mother, they run outside and encounter Santa.  He asks them what they want for Christmas and instead of presents for themselves, they ask for a replacement vase.  I suggested that we end the story with Santa being impressed by their selflessness and giving them not only the vase, but also plenty of presents.  People liked that and so we went about assigning the cast.  Adam and Yasmin were the children, Rebecca was the mom, Sara, Katherine and Serena were the party guests, Sydney with a flair for the dramatic was going to play the tree – including the topple - and I, the only adult male, would play Santa.  Tara was going to be filming and Serena would also be responsible for on-the-fly set changes. 

My Reindeer Headgear!

We started by selecting the props and as Santa, instead of a sack on my shoulder; I got to carry some long stuffed animal toy.  Plus, we couldn't find a Santa’s hat and so they gave me reindeer cap, which looked totally ridiculous.  This was then replaced by a very colorful Oriental hat.  We then did a couple of practice runs and poor Sydney had to fall down in all of them.  Finally, we were ready to film and our practice helped us a lot.  We all applauded the effort and then it was time to go.

We said goodbye to the children and before leaving I made a pitch to the volunteers to support the Macy’s Believe Campaign – nothing like a little cross promotion.  I walked to the train station chatting with Sydney and she was off to another assignment where she was going to be tutoring some kids.  The opportunity description for this on Chicago Cares website had concluded by saying “Students build confidence and abilities, and you may just learn something as well”.  I certainly had.  I had learned that sometimes tragedies such as one which happened yesterday are almost impossible to avoid and its natural to get angry.  But we can take comfort in each other and in children who look up to us for guidance.  Today was exactly what was required.  I went to see ‘The Hobbit’ later that day and there is a dialogue where Gandalf talks about how Saruman is wrong about people.  In context of what had happened, I couldn't have said it better. 

“Saruman believes it is only great power that can hold evil in check, but that is not what I have found. I found it is the small everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay... small acts of kindness and love”.


*All the client's names have been changed in order to respect their privacy

Macy’s ‘Believe’ Campaign for Make-A-Wish® - Part 3

Location: Macy’s in Water Tower Place

Date: November & December 2012

The word says it all

“All I want for Christmas is my mom to be happy and have her not worry about money”

You presume that on this task all the letters would be children wishing for toys, games or other fun items; never expecting to find letters of kindness, love and hope.

“The thing I want for Christmas is for my sister to get the dog she wants.  She named (him) and is writing a diary for him”

You think that even though children make a wish, it could just be a passing fancy.  After all, they always give up and move to the next thing, don't they?

“I can’t get my two kids very much this year for Christmas.  But I do want them to always be happy and grateful for what they have and to think of others who don’t have much.  May the spirit of Christmas always be in their heart”

You assume that poverty leads to despair. How could people find any happiness if they are poor?

“My Mom works two jobs just to make sure we can eat.  All I want is money for her to buy herself and my brother and me clothes, also a game for us to play”

You spend so much of your life worrying about petty things that build your ego

“My Mommy and I have nowhere to live. We lost our home.  Mommy lost job.  We live with Grandma.”

You really complain about small inconveniences don’t you?

“I want a bed to sleep on when I come home from school”

You grow up taking for granted all the basic things in life, and think that while the world is not fair, people usually adapt.

“I want my Mom and Dad to spend the Holidays together”

You think that every child of a broken home eventually gets used to it.  People definitely adapt, don’t they?

“This year I would like to find happiness and true love”

You walk on the streets and see people going about their daily lives, never imagining what they may be thinking… how they may be feeling.

“Please send me a boyfriend for Christmas. I’m lonely”

You see happy couples walk hand-in-hand and feel glad that everyone has someone to be with…almost everyone

“All I want is to be happy.  I’ve spent to long being hurt by the one that I care about, who doesn’t care about me.  He has moved on and I’m stuck here, depressed.”

You think that time usually heals all wounds, and scars can be covered by wearing a mask.

“Send me the love of my life.  A woman who would love me as much as I love her and who would make me believe that it was worth the wait.”

You really feel that all it takes is time to make things better, don’t you?

“I hope my boyfriend’s children open their minds and hearts for acceptance.  This I know you can’t provide so a prayer is all I need”

You may be bitter that you do not have anyone, but surely those who do, have a happy fulfilling life.  After all what else do they need to worry about?

“I would like for people to stop being mean to me”

You see people working in stores, or flight attendants on a delayed aircraft, or in any industry which requires people to smile and say nice things, no matter how they are treated.  Never knowing what it must be like to be in their shoes.

“For Christmas I would like friends”

You see people at restaurants having dinner by themselves or going to movies alone and think it is the life they have chosen; they must surely love their solitude.

“Please let my friend find true happiness, whatever that may be”

You think that friendship is something that people use to fill time in their life. 

“I wish I could fix everything with my best friend whom I lost”

You are sure that friends can easily be replaced, right?  After all, how can all bonds be for life?

“First off, I would like to say that I would like a number of things.  Second, I would like to say that I don’t deserve all that.  I want all of the poor people to have a good holiday and for them to eat good food and be warm and merry”

You think it’s a selfish world where everyone is just looking out for themselves and their own.

“If there is only one wish you can grant me it is this – Please let all the victims of the Connecticut shooting tragedy, especially the families, find peace someday.  Help them and the community that has been affected”

You live through one of the darkest days of your life and wonder how all of us can ever find comfort. It is a selfish world, right?

“I am poor.  I have no money or job, but I am still happy.  Santa please send my daughter a gift this year”

You think it’s silly to believe in Santa once you are grown up.  After all, only kids make a wish.

"Stop Hunger"
You spend all of your life not really believing that wishes can come true, not be very serious every time you flip a penny in a wishing well or blow a birthday candle.  But after reading all these wishes, you realize you were wrong about everything. 

“I want for every child in the world to have a present to open.  Please keep some of mine if needed”

You finally know that despite all the negativity that you see, life is full of generous people, whose kindness makes this a beautiful world. 

“I just want to say thank you for everything you gave me”
You find yourself one day, in front of a red mailbox in a retail store, writing a letter to Santa. You close your eyes, put it by your heart, and then with everything you hold dear, make a wish that you never planned for.

"I hope you get lots of money for the Make-a-Wish Foundation. Thanks for doing your good deeds"

You now want to go to every rooftop and scream aloud what Francis Church said all those years ago.

Yes Virginia, there most definitely is a Santa Claus

Library Maintenance

Location: Walt Disney Magnet School

Date: Tuesday, December 11, 2012; 6-8 p

This was my fourth visit to the Disney Magnet School, making it the project that I had done more times than any other.  While all the previous ones had been with Laura as the volunteer leader, this one was with Lauren and I had not worked with her before.  We chatted in the lobby and while a lot of people showed up, we found out that most of them were first timers, making me a veteran - something that I deviously used to my advantage. 

We proceeded to the library and Lauren explained that since Non-Fictions take the longest time (didn't I know that), we should focus on those first before moving to the Fictions.  Plus, if we found any books that were out of place, we were to correct that.  Then she asked us to proceed.  People made their way to collect the books for re-shelving and I saw some new folk pick up a stack of fictions.  I mentioned that Lauren wanted us to handle the non-fictions first and the poor things complied.  This not only left me with fictions, but also empty aisles.  I told Lauren that since there were a lot of volunteers in non-fiction section, I was going to start shelving fictions.  She looked suspicious, but since what I had said was accurate, agreed with my assessment.  It took four visits, but I was finally free of the Dewey!

UConn: For hours, I used to sit by the window and read

I put books on a cart and took them to the fiction section.  As I started shelving them, I came across many books that I had read as a child.  I have written about my relationship with libraries previously, but it is not just libraries that gets me excited about books.  Growing up, I used to spend hours looking at books sold by street vendors or in small book stores.  One of my favorite stories is when I was a new student at University of Connecticut.  One of my friends was visiting for the weekend and the next day we got up early and went for a drive.  Storrs, where UConn is located, is an extremely beautiful place.  This was a wet and misty fall day and we came across a very small township, one of those villages with one main street.  We parked and were exploring, when we found an old book store.  It was small; chock full of books and very narrow aisles.  We spend hours there, looking at books and even bought a few.  My friend left that afternoon and I told my roommates about the book shop that we had visited.  The funny thing is that I spent many more years at UConn, but as much as I tried I could never find that place again, as if it was my own Brigadoon. 

My thesis is now a part of the library

Katie, the head librarian was playing holiday music which really added some character to the evening. It also   reminded me of another holiday season from long ago when I was in Hartford and exploring a book store listening to holiday songs.  There really is something about books that sets one off on a nostalgic journey.  I had been back at UConn several times since graduating, but never visited the main library. Since I wrote about that special room in the library where I used to sit in the corner and read, I wanted to see the place again. On a recent trip I went back and visited that room and everything seemed like it had happened only yesterday.  I even went down to the vault in the basement where I used to go and read old thesis’ and found that my own was now a part of that collection.  Circle of life does move us all in turn.

There were a lot more fiction books than we had anticipated and we were not done by 8 pm.  Lauren told us to leave the rest on the cart and Katie thanked us for our time.  Now that I have done multiple projects with Chicago Cares, this may be the one that I will probably not return to.  I keep complaining about the hard work, but the reality is that we do not interact with anyone during this task and I really enjoy that part of volunteering.  Having said that, I will definitely sign up for this project if I am free on a Tuesday evening.    Many a time people assume that a project is too big or too small for them.  That is never the case.  Every small deed matters, though you may never know how. 

“I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; and because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something that I can do” – Helen Keller

And neither will I.